Alden Vanderkarr
Today is my dad's 75th birthday, though he claims that he is only 29.
Hmmn.
Every Wednesday afternoon he comes down to take me to lunch at Hubcaps, the local diner down the street from my day job. We come here under the pretense of eating and catching-up on what's been happening with our lives, but I'm pretty sure the real reason Dad visits me every week is to look at girls.
He recently got the lens in one of his eyes replaced and he can see better than he's been able to in years. He takes full advantage of this miracle of modern technology to enjoy the parade of girls in skimpy outfits that is downtown Walnut Creek on a summer afternoon and say things like "Her legs go all the way up and make an ass of themselves".
Maybe Dad is actually closer to 16 than 29.
He's the best.